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Scarlett Letter #78: Best practices: Clarify and confirm before responding.

Recently, I experienced an unpleasant communication exchange that took me by surprise. To support a friend in my network, I wrote an email speaking on her behalf. My note was sent to a decision maker in a department at Columbia College where I serve as an adjunct professor. Essentially, the series of messages went like this:

ME: … A colleague of mine expressed an enthusiasm for teaching at the college level. She was kind enough to share her slides from a recent speaking engagement to students at DePaul, and she mentioned that she has been in contact with you to potentially join Columbia as an adjunct professor in Fall2010. I’ve attached her presentation for your review when you have a moment (see her summary feedback below). If I can share any further information about S’s candidacy, please don’t hesitate to contact me.

REPLY: Anne, as much as I respect your opinion, as Chair of this Search Committee, it is inappropriate for me to review the information, so I have not. Nor will I, and I hope you understand. The position is posted and S. should apply on-line if she is interested in teaching full-time at Columbia.

Whoa. Not what I was expecting from someone with whom I thought I had a solid–more than solid!–rapport.

ME: Thanks for your quick response. I just reviewed the posted position you mentioned, which appears to be a full-time role. There may be a misunderstanding.  To clarify, my intention was to enhance the pre-existing communications that have already taken place {between Columbia and S}. But by all means, if there is an official channel to go through for part-time adjunct positions, then I’m sure S will be happy to take that route.

REPLY: Oh, so sorry, Anne. With the frenzy of enrollment for spring classes, we’ve been raining students here and I didn’t focus clearly enough. Certainly, when the pace slows, I’ll be happy to review S’s material, though I have to say, we’re pretty impressed with her already.  But send it along, won’t you? And again, sorry for the confusion.

This exchange was within a 20-minute time period, so luckily no one (most especially me!) had to fret for long. Still, it left an unpleasant taste in my mouth, and it also embarrassed me in front of my ‘network-friend’. This was a poor quality response after I had just proactively offered to give her an extra boost of support.

Whether we are on the receiving or giving end of an exchange, how can busy AEC professionals eliminate misunderstandings of this nature? And, how can we make sure that our behavior and tone does not come across as rude, snappy, condescending, etc? Both are big topics involving oral and written communication skills such as clarity and confirmation, along with emotional balance and de-stress skills.

I will expand upon these topics in future posts. In the meantime, I’m reminding myself to keep a thick skin and always move forward.

           

Tags: AEC best practices, AEC communication best practices, Anne Scarlett A/E Marketing, communication best practices, design and construction industry, design and construction marketing, linkedin, Networking, professional services marketing, professional services sales, Scarlett Consulting AEC business development

2 Responses to “Scarlett Letter #78: Best practices: Clarify and confirm before responding.”

1. Jason Burke

   January 18th, 2010

   It’s unfortunate that things have come to this. Sadly, it should come as no surprise that many organizations have extremely strict hiring policies, and that common sense often gets in the way of a nice, solid bureaucracy - especially a modern university.

   In retrospect, you probably discovered that it might be better to send a questioning message rather than the material or information up front. I actually had a similar situation, in which supporting information was eventually “requested” (though it was discussed in earlier messages) since the proper procedures had to be followed up to that point.

   Basically, they don’t necessarily know what to ask for, since they aren’t aware of the “body of work” so it is beneficial to mention casually that you may have a particularly useful piece of information that can be delivered at the appropriate time.

   The incident probably also underscores the ease with which email communication can be misunderstood and psychologically irritating.

2. Lawana Vesco

   March 2nd, 2010

   Thank you for sharing such an insightful article with all of us. I’ve bookmarked your blog will come back for a re-read again. Keep up the good work.

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